Shades of Gray

This passage of time feels endless and I have found my world flipped and turned upside down. Reaching deep inside I search for strength to accept what I never knew was possible. Sharp corners - inside my mind feeding me endlessly and I wonder if they were always there. The angles are endless and what I once saw as pure I know was contaminated but not knowing at the time I swallowed it whole and built a life believing what I held as truth, was. I find myself looking at my life like shattered glass and I wonder how shattered glass can be both brilliantly beautiful and hauntingly sad? What do we do with the pieces? And like the chapters previous I know this too shall pass. It will be what it is and I know that accepting that is the only truth I can hold onto. I must celebrate it but I can't seem to find the courage to believe. So I go on because this is what I would tell another..... you must move forward, you must continue, there is no other choice, there is no other direction, you cannot go back, you must continue until the distance between the future and this fades into softer shades of gray.

From out of the shadows...

I often find that when my life leads to utter and complete chaos, my creativity spikes and my understanding of who I am and my place in the world turns concrete. I wish I could capture this part of the drama and hold it in my pocket but it seems that from out of the shadows this gift comes and I am grateful to be greeted by it. The wheels begin to grind and time spent in the studio allows me to escape from the world at large. Unfortunately I am in such a time now. The world at large is banished to a far corner and I creep to the studio looking for the solace that comes from doing something well and keeping oneself so preoccupied that the dark haunting thoughts that want to enter my mind are barred for a short while. I find strength in who I am when sitting at the bench. There is no pretense, no misunderstandings, no need to try to appear to be something I am not. I can just be and breathe and work. Me and the metal as one forging our way through hours of time as the hands slip around the clock. Perhaps this is what drew me to the arts in the first place. It is the only time I feel no need to be ashamed or cautious. It just is.

From the deepest part of me comes the latest concept that I am defining to collaborate with my current Element Collection. Not sure where it will go but there will be plenty of hours in the studio to discover the path.